Thursday, January 31, 2013

Synchronicity: How I Created The Universe - Part 6.5 - The Last 10 Minutes

By: Yoinkie

In January of the year 2012, a boy Named Ian Fletcher was walking through a mall, mostly browsing but also trying to find a great pair of shoes. Ian Was quite the ordinary kid; 16 years old, wasn't really doing all that well in high school, and didn't have a clue what he wanted to do afterwards. Ian was also someone that you could call shy. He never really thought of himself as shy however, he just always assumed that what he had to say, no one really wanted to hear or care about hearing. He suffered through some self-esteem issues, and because of this, he decided that he just wouldn't try all that hard in life. To him, not trying meant not failing. Because of this, Ian had only had one girlfriend in his life, and the only reason for that was because it was her who had asked him out. But they had broken up a year or so before, and this did nothing but hurt his self-esteem even more.
He had found a great pair of shoes, and since he didn't like shopping all that much, he decided it was time to leave. As he was walking past an "American Eagle", he just so happened to glance to his left, where he saw the most beautiful girl he had ever seen in his entire life. She was sitting at one of those benches in the middle of the mall, and seemed to be sitting alone and waiting for someone. Now, when I say that this was the most beautiful girl that Ian had ever seen, that is exactly what I mean. He decided then and there, that no matter where he went in life, or who he met, no one would ever match the pure beauty of this girl. For a split second, Ian slowed down, thinking about approaching her, but decided that that was nearly impossible, and went on his merry way. He never left the mall though, instead wrapped all the way around, as so that he could walk past this girl once again. He did, and she was sitting in the same bench, staring off into the abyss. Once again, Ian thought about approaching her, and that thought was immediately followed by, "what the fuck, are you stupid? What will you say? What will she say? And what will you say after what she says? You have NOTHING to say. Keep walking, there's the door, use it." And just like that, Ian walked onward again.
But again, he didn't leave the mall. Instead, he wrapped around again, and saw that the girl was sitting in the same spot as she had been the previous two times he had passed her. It was then that Ian decided to do something incredibly stupid; he decided to break down his life long barrier, and decided that this one time, for 30 seconds, he would find the most incredible, insane courage he had ever mustered up and sit down and talk to her. And he was about to do so, until almost the last second he had to ditch, and keep walking forward without looking like a fool. And that is what he did. But again, he didn't leave, instead made his fourth trip. On this trip, he didn't think about anything, and he didn't think about the things he could say. Instead, he walked up to the most beautiful girl he had ever seen, and sat down beside her.
"Hey... can I tell you a story?" He asked her. Surprised, she looked back at him, smiled, and said yes, she would love to hear a story.
"This story is about a boy. A boy who really doesn't have anything special in his world, but he is contempt with it. The reason for that is because this boy, is scared of the world and everyone in it. He cant stand looking like a fool in front of people, or being embarrassed, so one day this boy decided that he would no longer do things that make people look like a fool or be embarrassed. And let me tell you, this theory of his worked without a hitch. He just assumed that people just don't like hearing what he had to say about anything, so he decided that he would rarely speak. Then one day, this boy was walking through a mall by himself, minding his own business, when the universe decided it wanted to be funny, and presented in front of him the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. The boy walked past this girl a couple of times, because he wanted to see her again and again, but didn't dare breaking his philosophy of never doing anything that scared him. But the fourth time he walked past this girl, a new thought popped into this boys head that he had previously never in his life thought of. Do you know what that thought was?"
"No, what was that thought?" She asked curiously.
"The joy of living outweighs the fear of being afraid. The boy thought of all the times in his life that he had been embarrassed, been awkward, or been made a fool of...And the potential of one great thing happening is enough to live through those moments all over again. Hi, my name is Ian Fletcher, and I would absolutely love to take you out to dinner sometime."
She could have said no. And if someone had the technology to see how an alternate universe would have worked out where she in fact would have said no to him right then, they would have still seen that that moment changed Ian Fletcher's life forever. The reward of trying something, even if that something was insanely stupid, made him feel alive inside. And in this alternate universe, Ian Fletcher would have gone on to live a full life, full of times where he attempted things that were insane, stupid, and irresponsible; all of which gave his life meaning.
But this isn't an alternate universe, this is the real universe, and in this universe, the girl smiled, and gave him her number. And Ian walked away with the biggest smile that ever came across his face, and even said hello to 3 strangers on his way out.
As Ian walked out the door, he looked down at his watch and noticed it was 7:44pm. He had promised his mom he would be home for dinner at 8, and he lived 20 minute walk away, so he decided that he better start walking faster.
1 minute later, all of time, space and the Universe ceased to exist, and were forever replaced by Nothing.

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Synchronicity: How I Created The Universe - Part 6 - He Did Nazi This Coming

By: Yoinkie

You are probably wondering, with an infinite number of places to visit, things to see, and history unfold, why did I choose to have Nathan take me to kill Hitler? Well, firstly, The Jewish blood in me probably compels me to do so. But that isn't the main reason. The fact that my grand mother and grand father both spent time in Nazi Concentration camps has always pissed me off. But that isn't the main reason either. The thought of how different the world would have been if there had been no World War 2, no Hitler, and millions of people would have had the chance to live out a full and meaningful life is absolutely fascinating... but not the main reason I felt compelled to make that journey.

Link to part 1:

No, the main reason why I choose to go and kill Hitler is because of the way he died. Hitler may have lost all hope of winning World War II but he hadn't lost his damnable pride. The thought of being taken prisoner by people he considered his inferiors was more than he could handle. So on the morning of April 30th, with the war all but lost and Russian forces closing in on his Berlin bunker from all sides, Hitler decided it was time for him to go. Historical accounts say that he had a lovely lunch with his friends, comrades, and his new wife(who he had married the previous day). Afterwards, Hitler and his Wife, Eva Braun(Bitch), retreated to his bunker, and took their own lives. There friends soon rushed in after and found the two hand in hand on the couch, with Eva(Bitch) dead from biting a Cyanide capsule, and Hitler dead from a bullet through the head. Hitler had given them orders to burn his body so that the Opposing forces couldn't take his body and parade it around as a token of their victory.
FUCK. THAT. SHIT. The man who killed without remorse, destroyed without compassion, and attacked without precaution, goes out in such a peaceful way? And to top it off, with a last sign of love, going with his brand new wife(Bitch), in a bunker, with the method of death that he chose? FUCK. THAT. I know that I can't change my universe, because of the domino effect. If I do kill Hitler, it will be in a parallel universe that has no correlation to my own. I can not save the millions of people who died, nor can I prevent world war 2, and I definitely couldn't keep my great grandparents(and the parents, brothers, sisters of million others) from Nazi Concentration camps. But you know what I could do? Cut off that mother fuckers legs and arms and watch him suffer. I might just kill his wife(Bitch) first and make him watch, if I'm feeling a little bit frisky.
"So. You want to kill Hitler? I've gotta tell you, that thought has crossed my mind a few dozen times." Nathan said to me, and I knew he was on board. "How do you want to do it? More importantly, when?"
This was a good question. Ok. Lets think. It has to be before the war, because even if it is just a parallel universe, I still want it to witness a world without Hitler, and without World War 2. But it can't be way before the war, because Hitler needs to know that I am killing him for what is about to happen. "1939, Nathan. August. I hear Berlin is beautiful that time of the year."
"Ah. Good choice. So, how do you plan on doing it? You want me to just, so to say, beam us into Hitler's office? There will be guards, you know. We may have to fight. You ok with that?" Asked Nathan.
"I'm ok with whatever it takes, Nathan. But, just to be safe, we should take some guns. Can you make that happen?"
"I don't see why not." And half an hour later, with a couple of AR 15's by our sides, Nathan told me to get ready, because he was going to drop us in the basement of Hitler's mansion. We took a little time to describe to me in detail what to expect, how many guards, which way to go in case we split up, etc. He handed me a detailed map of Hitler's compound circa 1939(thanks to the internet), and gave me a 5-4-3-2-1 countdown, and just like that, everything around me disappeared and was replaced with a dark, and cold room, which I immediately figured to be the bunker that Nathan had told me about.
I've never shot anyone in my life. Hell, I've only shot a gun once, while on vacation in Hawaii, at a gun range. I didn't know if I could take another persons life, but I kept telling myself, that the people I would be killing, would be responsible for countless deaths, of women, of children, of anyone they see that wasn't one of them. Still, I didn't know if I could pull the trigger, when the time would call for it.
My concerns quickly evaporated, as soon as we took the first corner and saw two guard in Nazi uniforms. They noticed us right away, and before they could pull their pistols from their harness, I put 10 shots into both of them. Our AR 15's were silenced, but you could still hear the sonic crack of the shots, so I kept my gun up just in case anyone within shouting distance heard the shots. It was about this time that I had noticed that Nathan hadn't shot his gun when we were faced with the two guards. I assumed he was just waiting for me to shoot, to really know if I wanted to do this or would chicken out at the last moment. Having seen me not even hesitate to shoot, he took his hand off his watch(which I assumed was because he could quickly get us the fuck out of there in case shit went south), and put his gun upright and in the shooting position.
I remembered from the map that Nathan gave me that right up the stairs is a slightly long hallway, with Hitler's office at the end. I figured it was 30 feet from the top of the stairs to the office. I also assumed that there would be no way for Hitler's men to assume that anyone could have gotten this close to him(without the use of a time machine, of course) so the hallway probably wouldn't be that well guarded, if at all.
I was wrong. I peaked around the corner at the top of the stair case and noticed two guards posted on each door in the hallway, with a total of 6-7 doors. A sort of panic attack began coming over me, and I was about to walk back down the stairs when Nathan pushed me aside, and threw something into the hallway. "Flashbang! Get up here and light this hallway up!" Shouted Nathan, and I followed his order immediately, with panic attack and all. I figured between the two of us, we unloaded 40-50 total shots, and I wasn't sure if we hit anyone at all. We quickly reloaded before peaking into the hallway again. Empty. Thank God. As we quickly scurried across the now dead bodies, I suddenly became very aware that this wasn't a game, and these weren't paintball guns, and I really could die at any moment right now. Nathan probably noticed the look of panic on my face, and said, "We probably have 1-2 minutes before the entire artillery shows up. No more surprise. My research shows that Hitler is definitely behind those doors at this moment. When we get in there, you kill him, and you kill him quick. I need to be holding you when I hit my watch, or else you wont jump with me. You got it?!" I shook my head in agreement.
The door was locked, obviously. But 1940's locks were no match for our over-powered rifles. It took a couple of shots and you couldn't even tell there was a lock. Nathan kicked the door open, and I remembered the layout of this office from the map, so I immediately jumped inside and looked to the right.
I have felt evil 3 times in my life. Once, when I was a little boy, maybe 11 or 12, my scummy neighbor invited me into his house when he saw me playing in the yard. He grabbed my arm aggressively when I got close, and pushed me inside. It was less than 30 seconds before my parents showed up the door to save me. But in those 30 seconds, I felt evil.
The second time I felt evil when I was in "nothing". You remember me telling you about that, right? and the third time, well, the third time was right at that moment. A man sat in a giant brown desk, looking right at me, as if I was some sort of client of his that he was expecting. He didn't twitch, and he didn't panic; he just stared at me, with his hands crossed. I knew it was him, even though I had never seen the man before, he had that face that you just know. And I felt an intense wave of evil, just overtake me. The barrel of my gun pointed at his head, I tried to shoot my rifle, but I couldn't pull the trigger. My fingers felt like they had frost bite, and I couldn't pull the trigger no matter how hard I tried. I can slightly remember hearing the faint shouts of Nathan over my shoulder, "Shoot! Shoot him, Neko. Fucking shoot him!" And I tried to shoot again, and I couldn't. And there he sat, calm and collected as I have ever seen anyone, especially someone with a fucking gun pointed at their head. Its almost like his eyes got into my soul and made me freeze.
It was at this time that I was thrown onto the ground and my arm basically yanked out of its socket and pushed up my back. Im sure it hurt, but I didn't feel any pain. I felt nothing. And I looked up and saw Nathan, fight off one guard with his hand, and unload the rest of his clip into a few others. And then I heard him scream 2 words. He screamed them 3 times in repetitive fashion. And he screamed them at me. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'M SORRY." And just like that, he was gone. The look on the guards faces who were at that time trying to grab Nathan, was quite priceless. I turned my head the other way, to the direction of the desk, and I saw sheer fascination and joy in the face of the man who had now gotten up off his desk and was walking over toward me. He picked up the gun which had previously been mine, and while observing it said something in German. And that was the last thing I remember, from that day.
I awoke, sometime later. Fuck if I remember how long I was out, but I had a throbbing pain in my head that was worse than any migraine I had ever felt. I was in a room. No, check that, it was a prison cell...yup, definitely a prison cell. The intensity of the situation didn't settle into my brain until much later; after trying to open the jail cell(ya right, really?) and shouting at guards down the hall to let me out(again, did I really think this would work?). After doing that, for an hour or so, I decided to sit down, shut the fuck up, and get my barrings.
I was in a prison cell. WORSE, in Hitler's prison. WORSE, in Hitler's own private prison, in the heart of fucking Berlin, at the start of World War 2. WORSE, I was here alone, without a plan, or a friend. Nathan. I remembered Nathan. At first, I was mad. I was furious. He had left me, and saved him self. I contemplated on this thought for an hour or so, and hated the man who had grown to be my friend. And then, I realized what had actually happened.
I fucked up, stared at Hitler in his office for probably more than a minute, and hence allowed his guards to come to his rescue. With me on the floor incapacitated, Nathan only had two options: go Rambo and take out all of Hitler's first officers, or save himself. But it wasn't himself he was saving, it was his watch. Nathan was a man that I had grown to know very well, and had learned a lot about him. He never backed down in the face of adversity, he always kept his cool, he would never let me die, and most importantly, he would never let his watch into the wrong hands. I mean, can you imagine? Hitler with a time machine? My anger over Nathan leaving me had completely subsided, and I knew that what he did was the only thing he could have done. If he had stayed and fought, and lost, we would both be in this prison, and Hitler would be off to see the joys of time and space. And worse than that, the entire Universe would soon be gone, because Hitler doesn't strike me as the kind of man who would care to save the Universe, Time and space. I made my peace with the situation, and if only one of us could have survived this situation, I was damn glad that it was Nathan. He would save the world, and I would die in this prison, in Berlin, in 19 fucking 39. I was ok with it all, but I have to be honest and tell you that I was very much looking forward to killing that son of a bitch Hitler, and then some day saving the universe. It wasn't meant to be, I thought, and went to sleep.
That sleep didn't last that long. Over the next 4 days, I was put through, well... hell. Hitler was an unforgiving man and he didn't much care for prisoners, he always just killed his enemy. But I knew he wouldn't kill me just yet. He knew that I had a weapon that he had never seen before, my silenced AR 15, and more importantly, he had seen a man disappear right in front of his eyes. I knew that Hitler wouldn't think this was some sort of trick. I had read a lot about Hitler and his ways, and had learned that he had always had a special task force assigned to investigating the paranormal. he was fascinated with advanced science, as well as telekinesis and forms of mind control. I figured that Hitler knew that Nathan and I weren't just average soldiers assigned to kill him.
The first day, they beat me, and demanded to know who sent us, and how we got into his compound. It hurt, real bad, but I never said a word. The second day they drugged me, with what I assume was massive amounts of Methamphetamine, Hitler's drug of choice(little known fact that Hitler did Meth almost every single day during the War). I assumed they did this because back than they thought Meth was a truth cerium. I can't tell you if it is or not, because I was way too fucking high to know what was going on. On the third day, they drugged me again, with what I would say is Mescaline, mixed with something else I couldn't quite put the finger on. The doses they gave me were much more than the day before. I don't remember much of this day except that someone was always in my cell asking me questions. I dared not think about what those questions were, because as I have told you, I did graduate from MIT, and I probably know more about a lot of things than most. I tried my hardest not to say anything, but I couldn't be sure under my dire conditions. I figured, that whatever I told them, it would be not be dire unless I told them about U-235. The two main reasons that Germany and their alliance never won the War was because 1) Hitler was a bitch, and he persecuted or alienated almost every single German scientist at the time(Albert Einstein, Werner Hisenberg, Max Born, the father of the Atomic bomb Robert Oppenheimer, etc). And 2) The few scientists that Hitler did manage to keep, never discovered the secret to purifying U-235. They got close, but could never quite get there. Thank God.
The fourth day I was in Hitler's prison was September 1st, 1939, also known as the start of World War 2. Hitler and almost all of his top officials would be elsewhere, most likely overlooking the invasion of Poland, from a safe distance like a bunch of little bitches. I figured that today would be the day that either I escape from Hitler's prison, or the day that I die. It was also the day that I met Hershel Simmons.

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Santa Claus the Magic Mushroom

Have you ever wondered why on Christmas we cut down/carry evergreen trees inside our houses, decorate them with fancy ornaments, and place presents underneath them?

"So, why do people bring Pine trees into their houses at the Winter Solstice, placing brightly colored (Red and White) packages under their boughs, as gifts to show their love for each other and as representations of the love of God and the gift of his Sons life? It is because, underneath the Pine bough is the exact location where one would find this ‘Most Sacred’ Substance, the Amanita muscaria, in the wild.” –James Arthur, “Mushrooms and Mankind”

The Amanita muscaria is the red and white magic mushroom that grows almost exclusively beneath Pine trees. Their main psychoactive ingredient is 'muscimol,' as well as trace amounts of DMT, an entheogen naturally produced in the brain’s pineal gland. The pinecone-shaped pine-al gland is an organ that produces the same DMT found in this pine tree fungus, and much more.

"DMT exists in all of our bodies and occurs throughout the plant and animal kingdoms. It is a part of the normal makeup of humans and other mammals; marine animals; grasses and peas; toads and frogs; mushrooms and molds; and barks, flowers, and roots ... DMT is . . . in this flower here, in that tree over there, and in yonder animal. [It] is, most simply, almost everywhere you choose to look." Indeed, it is getting to the point where one should report where DMT is not found, rather than where it is." -Dr. Rick Strassman, “DMT – The Spirit Molecule

The Pine tree is one of the well-known central relics of Christmas. Under this tree is where those who are deemed good find their reward in the form of a present. A big red and white rounded mushroom grows under the very tree we are to look under on Christmas morning to find our gift.” –James Arthur, “Mushrooms and Mankind”

Green, red, and white as Christmas colors comes from the evergreen tree and the red and white mushrooms underneath. The word Christmas originally comes from the Egyptian KRST (oiled/anointed one) and Mes, the sacred cakes annually made/ingested by the Egyptians. This Eucharist was originally made from Amanita muscaria or was the mushroom itself. The tradition existed all over the ancient world, but most of the iconography / symbology recognized today comes from pre-Christian Northern Europe.

“The very name, ‘Christmas’ is a holiday name composed of the words, ‘Christ’ (meaning ‘one who is anointed with the Magical Substance’) and ‘Mass’ (a special religious service/ceremony of the sacramental ingestion of the Eucharist, the ‘Body of Christ’). In the Catholic tradition, this substance (Body/Soma) has been replaced by the doctrine of ‘Trans-substantiation’, whereby in a magical ceremony the Priests claim the ability to transform a ‘cracker/round-wafer’ into the literal ‘Body of Christ’; ie, a substitute or placebo.” -James Arthur, “Mushrooms and Mankind”

Although most people see Christmas as a Christian holiday, most of the symbols and icons we associate with Christmas celebrations are actually derived from the shamanistic traditions of the tribal peoples of pre-Christian Northern Europe. The sacred mushroom of these people was the red and white amanita muscaria mushroom … These peoples lived in dwellings made of birch and reindeer hide, called ‘yurts.’ Somewhat similar to a teepee, the yurt's central smoke hole is often also used as an entrance. After gathering the mushrooms from under the sacred trees where they appeared, the shamans would fill their sacks and return home. Climbing down the chimney-entrances, they would share out the mushroom's gifts with those within … Santa also dresses like a mushroom gatherer. When it was time to go out and harvest the magical mushrooms, the ancient shamans would dress much like Santa, wearing red and white fur-trimmed coats and long black boots.” -Dana Larsen, “The Psychedelic Secrets of Santa Claus” Cannabis Culture, Marijuana Magazine, Dec 18th, 2003

To this day Siberian shamans dress in ceremonial red and white fur-trimmed jackets to gather the magic mushrooms. First they pick and place the mushrooms to partially dry on nearby pine boughs which prepares them for ingestion and makes the load lighter. This is why we decorate our Christmas trees with ornaments and bulbs, because the gatherers would always adorn trees with drying mushrooms. Next the shaman collects his red and white presents in a sack and proceeds to travel from house to house delivering them. During Siberian winters, the snow piles up past the doors of their yurts (huts), so the red and white clad shaman must climb down the smoke-hole (chimney) to deliver the presents in his sack. Finally the appreciative villagers string the mushrooms up or put them in stockings hung affront the fire to dry. When they awake in the morning, their presents from under the pine tree are all dried and ready to eat.

The amanita mushroom needs to be dried before being consumed; the drying process reduces the mushroom's toxicity while increasing its potency. The shaman would guide the group in stringing the mushrooms and hanging them around the hearth-fire to dry. This tradition is echoed in the modern stringing of popcorn and other items.” -Dana Larsen, “The Psychedelic Secrets of Santa Claus” Cannabis Culture, Marijuana Magazine, Dec 18th, 2003

The ancient shamanic use of Amanita muscaria in Siberia is well documented. Despite governmental oppression against its use, there are still many who refuse to accept the authorized state religion, and continue the shamanic traditions in secret. Just as the Siberian shaman (commonly dressing in red and white) would enter through the opening in the roof of a home where a ritual was to be done, Santa Claus also arrives on the roof and enters through the chimney. Just as the shamans would gather the mushrooms in bags which they would bring with them when performing a ceremony, Santa Claus also (on the Holy Day) brings presents in a bag.” -James Arthur, “Mushrooms and Mankind” 

Siberian reindeer also enjoy eating amanita mushrooms and thus are often used as a lure by the deer-herding natives. Since one of the hallucinatory experiences often felt on psychedelic mushrooms is that of flying, Santa’s flying reindeer most likely derive from this.

Reindeer were the sacred animals of these semi-nomadic people, as the reindeer provided food, shelter, clothing and other necessities. Reindeer are also fond of eating the amanita mushrooms; they will seek them out, and then prance about while under their influence … The effects of the amanita mushroom usually include sensations of size distortion and flying. The feeling of flying could account for the legends of flying reindeer, and legends of shamanic journeys included stories of winged reindeer, transporting their riders up to the highest branches of the World Tree.” -Dana Larsen, “The Psychedelic Secrets of Santa Claus” Cannabis Culture, Marijuana Magazine, Dec 18th, 2003

The flying reindeer, sleigh, and the entire Santa Claus mythology originates from Siberia where Saint Nicholas, the patron Saint of children, is a supplanter to the indigenous Shamans.

Saint Nicholas, known as the ‘Patron Saint of Children,’ is the most revered saint in Russia, second only to the apostles. He is the Russian Orthodox Church's supplanter to the native people's highly respected local Shaman. A Shaman is a holy man that is well acquainted with a form of spirituality that incorporates plant entheogens which facilitate the NDE (Near Death Experience), or ‘out of body’ experience. Saint Nicholas may not have been a shaman, yet the symbolism on, and coloring of his robes could lend to speculation.” –James Arthur, “Mushrooms and Mankind”

One of the side effects of eating amanita mushrooms is that the skin and facial features take on a flushed, ruddy glow. This is why Santa is always shown with glowing red cheeks and nose. Even Santa's jolly ‘Ho, ho, ho!’ is the euphoric laugh of one who has indulged in the magic fungus.” -Dana Larsen, “The Psychedelic Secrets of Santa Claus” Cannabis Culture, Marijuana Magazine, Dec 18th, 2003

Could this by why Rudolph’s nose is red?

"Santa's famous magical journey, where his sleigh takes him around the whole planet in a single night, is developed from the ‘heavenly chariot’ used by the gods from whom Santa and other shamanic figures are descended. The chariot of Odin, Thor and even the Egyptian god Osiris is now known as the Big Dipper, which circles around the North Star in a 24-hour period. In different versions of the ancient story, the chariot was pulled by reindeer or horses. As the animals grow exhausted, their mingled spit and blood falls to the ground, forming the amanita mushrooms.” -Dana Larsen, “The Psychedelic Secrets of Santa Claus” Cannabis Culture, Marijuana Magazine, Dec 18th, 2003

It is fairly common knowledge that the Weihnachtsmann (St. Nick) was an amalgamation of older Germanic/Norse gods such as Thor, Donner, Odin and Wotan. What's missing here is just as Santa flies through the skies in his sleigh, Odin (as well as the rest) rode through the sky in his chariot, which is depicted in the stars by ‘The Big Dipper’. The Big Dipper is the chariot of Odin & Wotan, Thor, King Arthur, and even Osiris (of Egypt). The chariot that circles the North Star in a 24 hour period is thus also known as the sleigh of Santa Claus because it circles his mythological home, the North Pole. It is no surprise that Nordic/Germanic gods have connection to mushrooms in their mythology. As Thor throws his mushroom-shaped hammer to the ground, mighty thunders and lightning cracks cause the real mushroom(s) to appear. As the horses pulling Odin through the sky in his chariot become over-exerted, their blood-mingled spit falls to the ground and causes the Amanita mushrooms to grow at those exact points.” –James Arthur, “Mushrooms and Mankind” 

Probably the first Santa was Osiris in ancient Egypt who rode his flying chariot to/from the North Pole, was born on December 25th, and celebrated by putting presents underneath an evergreen tree.

Not only did Osiris ride the sky in a chariot, but after his death Isis found that an evergreen (Cedar) had grown overnight from a dead stump to full-sized; which was understood as a sign of Osiris' rebirth and immortality. Interestingly, the traditional birth of Osiris is the 25th of December. The 25th of December was also celebrated annually by putting presents around the Cedar tree. This tradition is at least five thousand years old. The birth of Horus to the goddess-virgin-mother, Isis, is perhaps the eldest representation of the goddess/son mythology, yet it is impossible to know this or the real age of the Astro-theological-Virgo-giving-birth-to-the-child/god/star mythology for sure. However it is the oldest source I have found.” –James Arthur, “Mushrooms and Mankind” 

Santa, an anagram for Satan, dresses in red, keeps lists of naughty/nice children, and seems to steal Christmas from Jesus. But if understood in its original mushroom context, Santa’s not a conniving, omniscient, list-keeper. He’s an Entheogen - a plant or substance which is said to “generate the God within.” The word Entheogen breaks down, En for inside, Theo for God, and Gen for generate – generate the God inside. If you have ever taken an Entheogen (i.e. Psilocybin, DMT, Peyote, Ayahuasca), then you are already aware of the spiritual or even religious experiences associated with them. As anyone who has tried them knows, and most anyone who hasn’t fiercely denies, these Entheogens put us directly in contact with that spark of the divine within ourselves. They allow access to higher consciousness and open our third-eyes; The outer material world dissolves and the “five” senses return to a state of one sense, one consciousness.

First hand understanding is through the ingestion of the holy substances, of which there has been so much written, that this brief expose' merely scratches the surface of. It is this direct communal contact which is truly the means whereby a human being can experience his true spiritual nature. One must take very seriously his /her own spirituality, for this is that which we truly are. As I stated in the opening sentence, ‘This experience is of extremely great value’. So much so, that I feel it necessary to the evolutionary process of each and every individual, and inevitably to all of mankind.” -James Arthur, “Mushrooms and Mankind”

If you have mischief, wickedness, or secrecy in you, then entheogens will take you down into the depths of your own hell. But if you have kindness, love, and truth within you, entheogens will raise you up into the heights of that heaven. When people of a poor disposition or in a negative mood eat magic mushrooms they usually have a “bad trip” and experience frightening or depressing hallucinations. When people of a good disposition or in a positive mood eat mushrooms they usually have a great trip and experience hours of uncontrollable laughter and a loving, close feeling with everyone around. Just like at Christmas Santa keeps lists of children who are naughty and nice, at Easter only good kids get to eat the colored eggs. This is likely because good kids on mushrooms are hilarious and lots of fun, whereas naughty kids on mushrooms guarantee a bad trip for everyone, so they get coal at Christmas and no eggs at Easter.

Santa Claus is an all-knowing icon that reads the hearts and intentions of everyone on the planet. Each child is told the story of the round-man (who wears red and white) and his associates; reindeer, little people and Mrs. Claus. They are also told the story of a miraculous worldwide flight in a sleigh which results in presents being delivered under a tree. Yet when a child reaches the age of reasoning he is informed that this story is all a fabrication. This revelation is devastating upon the psyche of a young mind. It is also at this time that the child is often comforted and pacified from the shock by very strong reinforcement that the religious systems which the parents or guardians profess are indeed factual. And an attempt is made to incorporate the respective religious traditions into the holiday as the REAL meaning for the celebration.” –James Arthur, “Mushrooms and Mankind”

Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny have both been uprooted from their original positions. They began as mythological mushroom heroes understood in a spiritual context by both children and adults. Now their literal meaning has been suppressed, and a fake image has been corporatized by Coke, Cadbury and others. The effect this has had is to turn mythological heroes into fantasies and lies. It was not meant for children to discover as they are coming of age that parents, family, and friends have lied to them about Santa and the Easter Bunny. It was meant for them to discover deeper meanings behind the mythologies such as the ancient Astrotheological understanding of the heavens, the knowledge of the zodiacal precession, and seasonal cycles like solstices and equinoxes. The whole complexity of the modern Christmas mythos is an unexplainable mess without the magic mushroom, the story is completely unintelligible.

Some psychologists have discussed the ‘cognitive dissonance’ which occurs when children are encouraged to believe in the literal existence of Santa Claus, only to have their parents' lie revealed when they are older. By so deceiving our children we rob them of a richer heritage … Many people in the modern world have rejected Christmas as being too commercial, claiming that this ritual of giving is actually a celebration of materialism and greed. Yet the true spirit of this winter festival lies not in the exchange of plastic toys, but in celebrating a gift from the earth: the fruiting top of a magical mushroom, and the revelatory experiences it can provide. Instead of perpetuating outdated and confusing holiday myths, it might be more fulfilling to return to the original source of these seasonal celebrations. How about getting back to basics and enjoying some magical mushrooms with your loved ones this solstice? What better gift can a family share than a little piece of love and enlightenment?” -Dana Larsen, “The Psychedelic Secrets of Santa Claus” Cannabis Culture, Marijuana Magazine, Dec 18th, 2003

Synchronicity: How I Created The Universe - Part 5 - Hello, Dexter Riley

By: Yoinkie

In some random town in Sweden, a man without a name sat down at local bar to gather his thoughts. The location of the town he was in has no relevance to the story, neither does the fact that he has no name. But because this story will talk about this man without a name quite a bit before it's over, I think its best if we give him a name; just make it easier to know who we are talking about, when we are talking about him. So, lets call him, Dexter Riley.
Say hello to Dexter Riley, but don't get offended if he doesn't say it back; his people had found out a long time ago that the subtleties that we have come to accept as "common introduction courtesy" are useless time consumers.
Dexter Riley had only talked to a few people while in this trip of his, and not because he wanted to, but because it was human culture to make small talk while trying to obtain something(in Dexter's case, it was a place to sleep, food and drinks). Dexter could understand the basic needs of small talk fairly well, but he still couldn't figure out why people asked the most common question asked on earth, "How are you doing?" Dexter really didn't care how anyone was doing, and couldn't understand why people all over cared how he was doing. The first time he was asked this question was just a few blocks away, while he was checking into the sleeping area, also called a hotel. The man behind the counter asked Dexter how he was doing, to which Dexter responded, "not well all at. My group committed the first mistake in the history of our company, and it is quite possible that the blame will fall on me." Dexter had continued to tell this man the tale of "how he was doing" until the man had blatantly cut him off, some 3 minutes later. Dexter was perplexed at why the man would ask him how he was doing in the first place, and then cut him off when he started to tell him. Why even ask a question when you don't care to hear the answer, he had thought. It was many observations later that Dexter learned the proper response to this question, no matter how you actually are doing, is "fine, thank you."
Dexter had also learned that people around here don't really care for the truth when talking about the weather, as well. A lady at the eatery had said to him in a passing conversation, that the weather they were having was quite lovely. Dexter wasn't one to let people live under false pretenses, so he decided to tell that lady that the weather wasn't quite lovely at all, and the rate at which this planets ozone was burning up, combined with the emission of the various gases their companies were producing, it was only a matter of decades before the earth burned and shriveled up like a marshmallow in a fire. This, coincidentally, was also the first time Dexter had experienced violence, as the lady sitting at the table next to him slapped him before running after her 2 daughters, who seemed to be crying while running out of the restaurant screaming. It was then that Dexter had decided, that no matter what anyone said or asked him, he would keep his mouth shut. While this was strange business to Dexter, he was pleasantly surprised how much easier it was to deal with people when you don't really say anything to them at all.
Dexter Riley was sitting at this bar, having a beverage and browsing through his guide book, trying to find a remedy to what he was currently feeling. It would have been much easier for him to do so, if he could actually comprehend what it was, that he was feeling. It was a few hours, and a few beverages, later that he found what he thought he was looking for. The bizarre feeling brewing inside of Dexter Riley, according to his universal guide book, was anger. Instantly Dexter thought back to the days at his learning facility, when his mentors would teach him and his comrades about the History of the universe. Those lessons often mentioned anger as the root of, and solution to, many of creation's problems. It had been the cause of many wars and separations. It had ended countless life forms and planets, but was also responsible for the rise of many empires. Dexter wished that he had studied this "anger" more extensively when he had a chance, but at the time felt it unnecessary to read about such things that had no impact on him whatsoever.
But it was clear as day that at this moment, Dexter Riley was feeling anger for the first time in his very long life. Something had gone wrong, very wrong, for the first time in his life, and Dexter, being the brilliant man that he is, put two and two together and determined that the cause of anger most likely stemmed from the situation that was arising around him. To make matters worse, Dexter would soon be meeting his companion at this very same bar. When Dexter thought of his companion, the word "annoyance" came to mind. While Dexter and his people may know nothing of "anger", annoyance was a very common feeling among his race. The reason his companion brought upon this feeling in Dexter was due to the fact that the said companion was very new to this job, while Dexter could barely remember a time when he wasn't doing this job. The difference in universal knowledge between the two was so astronomically different, that Dexter often thought that he could convince a metal object that it was alive before convincing his companion of anything at all. The fact that his companion had no name either has no relevance to this story, but just like before, my job is made easier by giving them names. So from this moment onwards, and at the request of Dexter himself, Dexter's companion will be called "Mr. Dumbfuck".
It wasn't long after Mr. Dumbfuck sat down at Dexter's table that his barrage of questions began. "I don't understand, what happened? How did this happen? How did we allow it to happen?" Dexter looked over at the metal chair sitting in the corner, and wished it was him he was talking to, but alas it wasn't. Dexter didn't want to answer such rudimentary questions that Dumbfuck was asking, but it was against his nature to do so. "We just don't know yet. All our monitoring systems failed simultaneously. Which is impossible, because our monitoring systems have never been programmed to accept failure. So its safe to say that they didn't fail, rather missed all of this."
"Well, that doesn't really make much sense, how could they have just missed this? They have been doing the same job for over 14 million years, how could they possibly just happen to miss one now, after all this time?" Mr. Dumbfuck continued to ask.
"We don't know. Usually when something unusual arises, we just look to the guidebook to determine what course of action was taken to fix the anomaly. But this has never happened before, so we just don't know what to do...yet." Said Dexter, slightly annoyed, but intoxicated, which made the annoyance feeling easier to handle.
"So what did they do, just stop time?" Mr. Dumbfuck was proving that the name given to him was proving to be dead on. "No, they didn't. They couldn't. You can not stop time. Its not an entity that be controlled with stopping, slowing, reversing, or speeding. There are only two things you can do with time; Go along with it, or leave it. And as we now know, Nathan and Neko left it."
"well, that doesn't make much sense either. How did they leave it? You told me that they came back nearly exactly when they left it."
"That's true, they did. This is what you need to understand; If someone was able to create a time machine, and effectively stop time. It wouldn't just effect them and the area they are standing in. It would effect their entire planet, solar system, galaxy, and Universe. Time ripples across the universe perfectly evenly, and effects everything exactly equally. It is the most perfect random occurrence in the entire universe. There is nothing you can think of, that isn't effected by time. And that's why we do the job we do. While it may be the perfect random event, and it has never been touched or distorted, we have always known that it can be broken." Mr. Dumbfuck gave that confused look that he often gave, and continued to ask his questions. "Yea about that. You were telling me that planets have gotten close to breaking it before?"
"Yes, many times in fact. The secrets of time travel are really not that hard to discover. Most civilizations have been very close to discovering it many times throughout their history, but fail to do so because they don't know what they are looking at, what they are dealing with, or because of us. We are the last line of defense."
"I know I should know this one, but tell me again, how are we the last line of defense?" Dexter knew Mr. Dumbfuck wasn't the smartest person on Arion, but he couldn't believe that this man was now asking him, basically, what their job is, was, and had been for 14 million years. Sometimes, Dexter failed to understand how Mr. Dumbfuck had obtained this job at all.
"sigh... A long time ago, before the merger of the Planet Arion and Planet Exosti, before the "great understanding", but shortly after the final Arion war, a small group was assembled. This group was assemble with to accomplish one task and one task alone, and their term under this job was life. Our only objective in life was to protect time, and use any method necessary to do so. As you probably know, or maybe you don't because you're awfully misinformed...Arion was the first planet to sustain life in the universe. Of course, there is no way of really knowing that, because we haven't explored the entire universe yet, nor is it possible to do so, but still, we hold on to that honor until someone else comes along and proves so otherwise. The final Arion war taught our race many things which helped us reach "the great understanding", but most importantly, it taught us that Time is something that no one should ever have control of. Although we never time traveled, we were already using our 'Mind TAP' capabilities to the fullest(TAP: Time altering predictions). The way that all life is created, it is formed and built to understand each other very well. We are all connected, and the Synchronicity of it all, while still being understood, is absolutely amazing. Most civilizations come and go without ever really taking advantage of their capabilities, and that saddens me greatly. Actually, the last few days here on earth I've been wondering how the human race has failed to achieve any form of Mind TAP thus far. Reading through their history books, it often talks about telekinesis, among other necessary mind created machines. They also seem to have a fairly good grasp on the randomness of the Universe, which is amazing in it's own right because it takes most civilizations at least a million years before they reach that point. Humans seem to understand that the universe is so perfectly random, that it doesn't make any sense whatsoever. They often question why the earth rotates so perfectly around the sun, and why the moon rotates so perfectly around the Earth. They understand the math and physics behind it, and seem to understand that the possibility of these events coming to be is almost 0.00%. If Earth's history was to continue much longer, I have a feeling that they will soon understand that the Universe works in such ways, that it hides itself in clear sight. The Universe WANTS to be noticed. From its creation, its only real purpose has been to be noticed. Hence the reason for life. The universe gives the push for life in completely unnoticeable ways. Yet, it doesn't really do a good job of hiding the evidence. Just look around you; everything is so completely random, that its perfectly random. an infinite number of minuscule events could have happened differently, and as a result entire civilizations probably wouldn't have existed. Yet they do, and here we are, sitting on the planet Earth, 7.23 light years away from planet Arion.
Anyways, what the hell were we talking about? Oh yes, the Mind TAP. We used the Mind TAP to determine the things that will happen next. At first, many people argued that the Mind TAP was a form of time traveling, because seeing the future and changing it was in fact, time traveling, even though we physically never went there. This is the truth, because Changing anything in the future, changes the entire course of history, because any certain point in the future, is some point in the more distant future's past. But then, people argued this fact with the theory of "its already happened". Basically, this theory goes like this: We can not change our past, because anything you do in the past that wasn't suppose to happen, changes everything on that particular planet, and also has the possibility of rippling out and changing the entire Universe altogether. We know that, and we understand that very well. But, we can change our future, because it hasn't happened yet. Imagine a circle of dominoes; If you try and inserting a domino in an already existing circle, the entire circle will seize to work and fall apart. Hence, the reason we can not change the past. But, visualizing this circle again, imagine setting a new piece of domino a little bit further along then where our current dominoes are. Sooner or later, our domino will hit that certain piece, and together they will continue onwards. The Domino circle does not break, it has only been altered. And that, Arion's leaders determine, was a good enough theory to continue using Mind TAP to prevent anyone in the universe from time traveling. Even the greatest skeptics of the Mind TAP agreed that using it to prevent time travel to the past was a good enough reason to keep it around. Using the lesser of two evils to prevent the greatest evil, you could say. So we used the Mind TAP to see into the future, but we limited it to only one purpose; to see what and where any civilization in the known universe was on the verge of learning how to time travel. The Mind Tap worked perfectly(up until now, that is). It gave us plenty of advanced warning, and even detailed how any certain civilization could be prevented from discovering time travel. We used that information, and went to those civilizations and prevented them from discovering the secret of time travel. It wasn't always easy, but we were always successful. By any means necessary...there were some critical points where decisions had to be made, and as a result, some civilizations were exterminated. Not as an act of war or aggression, but simply because losing a civilization was deemed necessary to prevent time travel. Our cause has never been easy, but our goal has always been the same; do whatever needs to be done, for the greater good of the Universe and time."
Dexter often got into zones while discussing the ins and outs of his job, and this time was no different. He shook himself out of this zone, and looked up to see that Mr. Dumbfuck was no longer sitting at his table. At some point in this conversation, he had gotten up and left to explore, without saying anything to Dexter. Dexter leaned back in his chair, and began to ponder to himself quietly. He saw no viable solution to his current problems. The Mind TAP had never failed, and never even gotten close to the point of letting Dexter down, and he couldn't understand why this situation was different. Dexter took a sip of his beverage, and wondered where Nathan Caldwell and Neko Clayton were... rather, when they were. He decided that there was nothing more he could do tonight, so he went back to brushing up on the history of the earth. Its history absolutely fascinated him, because the way they acted and how they resolved their problems was completely different than anything he was use to. But, he thought, that this was probably the case for many young civilizations. The growing pains before reaching "the great understanding".
Dexter continued to flip through his earth guidebook when he stumble upon a very interesting story about a great dictator in earth's history. Apparently, there had been a man named Adolf Hitler, whose mind was so convoluted that he choose to execute anything and everything that looked different than him. He thought, "If I had a time traveling machine, I would probably kill this guy." Dexter leaned back in his chair and chuckled at the thought.

The Giza Power Plant

The Great Pyramid has long been a source of mystery for the world. Specialists and lay people alike have been drawn to what it might tell us about our ancient past, with a variety of theories being offered for consideration. While there are over a hundred pyramids in Egypt, the majority of them, while important and significant themselves, seem all to be cast in the shadow of the Great.

But what is it that sets the Great Pyramid apart from the others?

"Lost Technologies of Ancient Egypt: Advanced Engineering in the Temples of the Pharaohs." In part a study of the precision, symmetry and geometry of the Ramses statues at Luxor and Memphis. Includes studies of many other sites in Egypt and artifacts that prove that advanced technology was used in prehistory.


A convincing new look into the pyramid as a device. Inspired by "Giza Power Plant" written by Christopher Dunn.

Monday, January 28, 2013

Synchronicity: How I Created The Universe - Part 4 - Nothing Happens

By: Yoinkie

This is the part of my life when nothing happened. It's funny the things you think about, when you can literally feel death. No, not see it coming or fear it; actually FEEL it. The first thing I thought about when it finally happened, was the 11 normal minutes I spent with Nathan Caldwell. You remember me telling you about that, right? It was the 11 minutes after I had just met Nathan on the side of the road in my home town, and was driving him to the mechanic shop. That was before I knew the real Nathan, which is strange to say because I don't really know much at all about Nathan even now. We made good small talk in the 11 minutes. He asked me about my work and relationships, and we enjoyed each others companies, even though we were complete strangers. In a different world, under different circumstances, I think Nathan and I could have become really good friends. He was funny, witty, and a very easy conversation partner. Right now, I'm reminded of a funny story he told me in those 11 minutes. He was telling me about a night where he and his wife got really high and sat around talking about the most bizarre things. "What does a penis feel like", was what Nathan's wife had asked him. Nathan told me that he had a darn good laugh at that one, but at the same time it was an interesting thing to think about. "Well, its hard to explain, because you don't have one, and you have never had one! How do I explain something to someone about something that doesn't really have words to describe it?" Is what Nathan told me he had told his wife that night. At the time, I thought it was just a funny story being exchanged between two guys, but good god, how relevant that story is to me, right now. That's Nathan Caldwell for you, even when he isn't explaining things to you, he still is.
That was the first thing I thought about when nothing happened. The second thing I thought about when nothing happened, was how different it was from what I thought "nothing was", or what anyone thought was nothing was. I know you are probably want me to describe to you what nothing was and what it felt like, and even though its impossible to do so, I'll give it my best shot, because to really understand my story, you need to understand everything I went through.
If you asked me a week before it happened, to describe to you what I think "nothing" is, here is what I would have told you: Nothing, is where there is no light, hence it must be dark. Wrong. Nothing, is where you cant really tell which direction you are facing, because you cant see a damn thing. Wrong. Nothing, Nothing has no sounds, because if there is no air or anything around you to make a sound, so no sound will be heard. Wrong again. "nothing" is probably cold, because there is no heat source. Sigh, wrong. "nothing" can be described by any human being, because we have seen pictures of empty outer space, hence we are able to comprehend what "nothing" looks like. You catching on to the pattern yet? Yea, wrong again. So basically lets summarize what 6 years of college, and 32 years of life taught me about "nothing": NOTHING.
Before I tell you, as best as I can, what nothing is, you have to throw out every definition you have ever heard of the word "nothing". Why? Because nothing has never existed, If nothing existed then that nothing would be something therefore nothing simply cannot exist. Geez, that last part really made me sound like Nathan Caldwell. Ok, let try this from a simpler perspective. The closest thing anyone of us simpletons can think of when describing nothing would be empty space right? Because Space is a vacuum, and an empty space contains no matter and no physical fields, hence, nothing. But even if there is no matter, gravity still exists here. If gravity exists in this empty space that we are imagining, then this empty space is not "nothing", it is something. Simply viewing this empty space, even if it is just in our mind, doesn't make it nothing, it makes it something. You may never fully understand Nothing, and trust me, you were never meant to. No one was ever meant to, because humans(and aliens and goats and whatever the fuck ever) were never meant to experience "nothing". Unless, of course, your name is either Nathan Caldwell or Neko Clayton, and you find yourselves smack dab in the middle of Nothing, because you destroyed space, time and the universe as a whole. Oops.
I know what you're thinking right now. "Damnit, so what did you see? What did you experience? Tell us something! You were there!" Here comes the laughable part of my entire tale, because what I am about to tell you will not make any sense, and was never meant to. For this part of the tale, I will refer to "nothing" as "hell" simply because I am sick of writing the word Nothing over and over again. So, in Hell there is no light, because light is made of matter, and matter does not exist in Hell. So absence of light equals dark right? Wrong, because darkness is SOMETHING, even if it is just the absence of light. Does a person without eyes see darkness? No, they don't, because they do not have eyes to perceive anything, because they have never seen anything. So, what did I see? I wont try and explain to you what I saw, I will show you. Ready? Ok. If you want to see what nothing looks like, right at this very moment, look at the world through your foot. Focus all of your energy on your foot, and tell me what you foot sees. You can't do it right, because your foot doesn't have eyes? So what would your foot see, if it didn't have any eyeballs to see with? NOTHING. Congratulations, you now know what nothing looks like.
Next, I want you to feel what nothing feels like. Using the tip of your right index finger, I want you to touch the tip of your right index finger. Look at your index finger, and focus all of your god given energy on trying to touch it at the exact same spot, with the exact same spot. Don't do it too long though, you will drive yourself insane. Congratulations, you now know what nothing feels like. Want to hear what nothing sounds like? Go ahead and turn on your stereo, and use your elbow to listen to the music. I think you know where I'm going with all of this.
It felt like death. Not dieing, or suffering, but just death. It felt like not existing, not being a part of anything, not...being. Man has long feared but tried to learn what happens to the human body after we die, and you may think that we end up in this "nothing" place I have described. But don't be afraid, because after you die, you will still be matter, hence you will not end up in this place. And I can assure you that even though I do not know where you go after you die, thank your lord that you do not end up in "nothing". It was the worst moments of my life, and I didn't even know how long it lasted, because time didn't exist in nothing either. But I got out of it, and I found myself Sitting on a beach next to Nathan Caldwell. "hey! welcome back to something! How did nothing work out for you?" Nathan said to me, with a smile on his face that gave me the greatest temptation to punch him. But I didn't, because I was far too happy to be somewhere. Anywhere.
"You know, you could have warned me, you bastard." I yelled back at him. "I could have, but now that you have been there, tell me, what could I have possibly told you to prepare for it?" He has a damn good point, because there really isn't anything he could have said, ad even if he tried, he could have talked about it for hours and still wouldn't have said anything relevant towards it. My anger towards him subsides, and I realize its time to get my bearings again. "where the hell are we now, Nathan?" Its a beach, and its hot, really hot. No one around, but I do see some people in the distance while I look around trying to gather my surroundings. "oh, no were really important. We're in Cancun, Mexico. No real reason to be here, but I thought you might like it considering what you just went through. Here, have a beer. You wont taste it, like usual." I almost ask why I won't taste it, before I remember the Gatorade, and the jalapenos chips.
It was at this time that i realized that I had enough of all of this mystery, and I needed some answers. So I got up, and walked away. I probably should have created a checklist a lot earlier, but I didn't, that's my fault. I think of everything I've went through in the last god knows how long, and think of all the questions I need answered, from Nathan, right now.
1) Why me. Why the fuck, out of all the people in the world, did he choose me?
2) Why anyone? So far, all I really know about Nathan is that he has traveled through time numerous times, been to "nothing" a few times at least, doesn't know why every timeline he goes to ends up in nothing at exactly 7:45pm on January 23rd.
3) What happened that lead to the universe collapsing at exactly that time? Nathan must know something, I know he knows something.
4)How did Nathan know where I would be, at exactly the right time? I've gathered some guesses in my head to this one, but I need to know for sure.
5) Why is he taking me to all of these places? I may not be smart, but I know that something very SERIOUS is happening, and it needs to be fixed. Why are we wasting time sitting on a beach in Mexico?
6) Who are "they"? Nathan mentioned them only once to me, but the mere thought of them brought fear to his face that I had not seen before or since.
7) How can I breathe? While the world and everything around me has been falling apart, even while I was in nothing, I have always been breathing.
8) Speaking of "nothing", now that I have witnessed it, doesn't Nothing now become something? The reason it was nothing before, was because no one had ever seen(or lack there of)it, hence it was nothing. But now, it is something.
Dozens of thoughts and questions keep running through my head, but Nathan calls me over and tells me to sit down. Good, its time to talk. "Nathan, you have to start talking to me, man. While I can make sense of the things around me most of the time, I don't have a clue in hell what really is going on. When are you going to start talking to me?"
"ok, what do you want to know?" Nathan says, while taking another sip of his tasteless beer. "ok, fuck, finally. Ok... how about... OK, why are you travelling through time? Why don't you just return to our timeline? You said you were the most wanted man in the world, but you also said that time only moves forward .25 seconds every time you return to our actual timeline. Lets start there, because that shit makes no sense."
"Ok, I'll answer your last part first. I'm the most wanted man in the world because the second I came to to our universe, to come find you, was the exact second that my team was made aware that I did not return to them. Like I told you before, we are able to jump to any timeline and any universe, but when we return to our actual universe, only that split second will have passed. Well, on every previous trial, as soon as my colleagues or I would time travel, we would instantly return, right to that lab again. The fact that I came to find you, must have instantly tipped off my team, and worse, our funding group, that I took the project TASM device elsewhere on earth, in our universe. When you steal a multi billion dollar device, people are bound to be looking for you. And there are others looking for me as well. But I haven't told you about them, yet. But don't worry, when the time is right, I will tell you about them as well."
Not really the full answer to my question, but hallelujah! for the first time, Nathan actually gave me a response to something I asked him. Good. We're making baby steps in our fucked up relationship. "so how long have you been travelling? And how do you keep track of where you are?"
"This watch here, is more complicated than it looks. I made some adjustments to it after I realized that I wasn't time travelling, rather creating new universes. So now, with this little watch of mine, I can keep track of which universe I am in, exactly where I am, and when I am. Right now, for instance, its 2005, Cancun Mexico." Nathan pauses for a moment, but I do not speak, because I have come to know these pauses very well; these are the pauses where Nathan starts thinking really deeply inside of his own head, and I dare not disturb it. "I've been... I've been travelling for a very long time Nathan. I told you about going back to my wedding day, twice, and living my life. And both times, ending up in Nothing, at exactly 7:45pm. I tested that theory out, I needed to see how many parallel universes were ending at that time, and why. So I traveled  And I traveled  a lot. I kind of stopped keeping track of time after a while(I smile and nearly crack up when he says this; a time traveler  not keeping track of time, how bizarre. But I let him continue). I've probably been travelling for 35, maybe as many as 40...." Nathan gazes off, pondering this question, but not really answering it. So I interrupt one of his pondering moments and ask him, "35 what? days? weeks? months?"
"42 years, 2 months, and 14 days. That's how long I've been travelling." Well, fuck. It's nearly impossible talking to this man. I asked him 1 question that I thought would be simple, and as a result of that, I now have 10 new questions to ask him. 42 fucking years? He doesn't look a day over 30. How? Why? Doing what? "Ive created 3,105 parallel universes, Neko. three thousand, one hundred, and fucking five. Each time I jumped, I created a new one. Even if I jumped into the same parallel universe, but a few years later, I created a new one. That would start from the moment I stepped foot inside of it. 3,105 earths. 3,105 different variations of it. And every single one, no matter when I jumped into it, no matter how little I interacted with it...every single universe, became completely different then ours. The fucking butterfly effect. You know one time, I went to 1974 to watch Bob Marley live, and right when before I got there, I saw a butterfly. So I killed it for sheer fascination. I went to that universe 40 years later to see what happened as a result of the dumb butterfly, and you know what happened? No internet. Go figure. Nathan Caldwell kills a butterfly in 1974 that wasn't suppose to die, and the world has no internet in 2010."
More questions. I almost want to tell Nathan to shut the fuck up, because every minute he speaks to me, I come up with 10 new questions. Why has he traveled for 42 years? Why has he jumped 3,105 times instead of just going back to our universe, or just staying in one? Why does him killing a butterfly in 1972 prevent the world from having internet?
"If you could go anywhere, Neko, and change history, where would you go and what would you do?" I think everyone has pondered this question at some point in there life, and I'm no different. I think I would like to alter my own life in some way, but I wouldn't want to know the consequences of that action. "We have to get to work soon, Neko. But we can make one last stop. So tell me Neko, any place, anytime in the history of earth. Tell me where you would like to go, and what you would like to do, and I'll take you there. Make it count, Neko, because afterwards, we have an awful lot of work to do."
What work is he talking about? I stop thinking about the 3 new questions I now have as a result of the sentence he just said to me, and I start thinking about where I want to go. The power to go anywhere and doing anything, feels like I power I shouldn't possess. I think it over for another minute, and then I figure out what it is I want to do.
"Alright, Nathan. Let's go kill Hitler."